Journey To The Center Of The Earth: Pokémon Style!
by WildSpiritCat
Summary: This was originally an assignment from my Science teacher called 'JTTCOTE'. So, I made mine and decided, I'll post it here for no reason. And what happens? Our favorite Legendaries are called upon to take a trip to the center of the Earth! -Oneshot-


**Journey To The Center of The Earth: Pokémon Style!**

* * *

The vibration of my cell phone above my bed was enough to get my attention. Until..._BAM!_ "Ow!" I whimpered, holding my head where the phone fell onto. Reaching for the phone, I tapped the screen and just stared at the number. It was: 1-800-IZTEHGUVMENTBRO.

No really. It was spelt like that and in all caps. How strange. I rolled my eyes and answered it. If it was a prank call, I'll have some fun too. "Hello?"

"WE HAVE BEEN CALLING FOR AN HOUR AND A HALF AND NOW YOU ANSWER?!" a male voice boomed into my ear, almost making me fall off my bed and fling my idiot Yorkie out the window.

"What, I'm sorry...wait. This is the first time you called me."

"No it's not." he quickly stated. "Anyway, we have a mission for you. It's the JTTCOTE."

I cocked an eyebrow and tried to figure it out in my head. "Just take the cookie...over the eggs?"

"NO YOU MORON!"

I yelped and flinched as he went on angrily. "You're to drill to the center of the Earth. Nothing more." I looked away, unsure of this. "Is this from Obama? If so, I'm not doing it."

"What? No! It's not from Obama."

"Good. What can I take with me?"

"You can take a baked potato for all I care! Just get here as fast as you can."

I tensed up when a robotic voice said a phrase. _"This message will self destruct in exactly a second and a half."_ I threw it out the window where it exploded shortly after and heard my mom cry out, "BRIANNA!" and quickly got on Skype. I knew JUST who to take with me!

**Somewhere in The Hall of Origin...**

Arceus boringly surfed the Interweb. Being a Legendary Pokémon was tough. Especially when he had to shout at the others to shut up as they fought. Man did his job suck.

A popup of Skype appeared and he rolled his eyes. 'Probably Keldeo asking me if he could battle Kyurem.' he thought, reluctantly hitting answer.

"Arceus are you there?!" a girl screeched, making him jump. "Ye-yes! Who is this may I ask?"

"Wait hold on...one moment."

**In the Distortion World...**

Giratina studied the screen of his laptop when he got a request to talk on Skype. "No one's ever wanted to talk to me before...AWSOME!" Happily, he pressed answer.

**Somewhere in time...**

Dialga boringly laid upside-down suspended in the air. "I swear to Arceus that it's been 30 minutes. My pizza's free." His phone rang, which the ringtone was strangely Barbie Girl, and he answered it. "Yo."

**Somewhere in space...**

Palkia grunted as he quickly dragged his butt along the floor. "Stupid Deoxys and his alien DNA!" He stopped, feeling the unbearable itching has subsided, and sighed in relief.

He then checked his Skype, knowing that Reshiram loved to bug him. Why he didn't block him, he'll never know. Instead, there was a blank icon with the name "WildSpiritCat" below it. Confused, he answered it.

**Back to where we were before...**

"Good, now that everyone's here, let me introduce myself." I smiled, sensing that they were listening. "My name's Brianna Larson and I-"

"Why the heck is Giratina talking with is?" Dialga demanded.

"Hey! I have rights too!" the Renegade Pokémon screeched.

"How did you know Giratina was talking with us?" Palkia questioned. They heard Dialga grunt. "I know things."

"At least I can afford to buy a laptop! Unlike you, who is talking over a phone."

"Hey! Shut up!"

Then he, Dialga, and forcefully Palkia, started arguing. I just watched silently, my eyes going from one to the other. We jumped when Arceus suddenly boomed, "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! SHUT YOUR TRAPS OR ELSE I'LL STRIKE YOU DOWN WHERE YOU SIT!"

"But wouldn't that mean you'd have to get up?" Palkia asked.

"DON'T QUESTION GOD!"

"But...you ARE God..." Dialga whispered.

"EXACTLY!" Arceus roared. The whole room went quiet. "Human," the Alpha Pokémon began, now in a softer and gentler tone. "You may proceed."

I swallowed and looked away. "Well uh...I'm on a mission to the center of the Earth and I'm requesting that you come with me."

"Why would we do that?" they asked at the same time. I shrugged. "Because 1-800-IZTEHGUVMENTBRO said so."

They were silent until Giratina spoke up. "Seems legit. What day and at what time do we meet?"

"Tomorrow right away. I'm assuming they'll pick me up so meet me at my house."

"Understood. Until then." Arceus murmured and ended the call. "Time to work on our human disguises."

**The next day...**

"Brianna, there're four men at the door for you." my mother announced. I walked down the stairs and she leaned up to me. "I can give you the taser, just in case."

"Mom, I'm sure a taser isn't necessary."

She backed up, placing her hands in the air, and walked away. "Okay. But be careful." I nodded and opened the door she almost closed and just stared at the four men standing there. The first had pure white hair with a gold streak in the middle, the second had gold hair, the third had dark blue hair with lighter blue streaks here and there, and the fourth had light lavender purple hair.

"Are you Brianna?" the one with white hair asked.

"Who may you be?" I questioned after nodding. He smiled and bowed. "A pleasure to meet you human. I'm Arceus. We spoke yesterday about your mission."

"YOU'RE Arceus?"

Arceus nodded and closed his eyes, smiling. "The one and only. In order for us to have been here right now, we needed to work on our disguises." I looked between them and smiled, walking outside. "So you must be Giratina?" Giratina nodded and tried to smile and I turned to the blue haired man. "And you're Dialga?"

Dialga nodded. "And then you must be Palkia." Palkia snapped his fingers and grinned. "Exactly." The sound of a throat clearing got our attention and the two stepped out of the way. There stood a girl no older than twelve. She had light green hair that had darker green tips, piercing blue eyes, and the cutest smile I could've ever seen.

"You forgot me!" she piped out. They gave her a mortified look. "Celebi?! Who let you come?!"

"Dad said I could come! Didn't you?" she whined. Arceus looked away, his eyes hidden in shadow. "I want no part of this..." They tried to suppress a groan but I walked up to her and grabbed her hand, looking back at them. "Well, the "Guv'ment" called and told us to meet them at the end of the road so we should get going."

"Ooh! Where're we going?" Celebi asked in excitement.

"On a grand adventure to the center of the Earth!"

A throat cleared and we stopped and looked at the source. My neighbor had just walked out of the house to take the garbage out and just stared at us until he walked back inside without taking his eyes off us. "What a weird guy." she grunted.

"I know." I whispered and tugged her gently along. "Hey, how'd you find me?"

"Google." Dialga replied.

**At the Government facility place and what not...**

"This is where you will get into your drill craft. Now please do not ask any stupid questions." the man I talked on the phone with murmured. "Any questions?"

"What's that?" Palkia pointed out.

"That's my coworker Jim."

"What's that?"

"That's some pizza we had for lunch."

"What's that?"

"That's my mo-MY MOM?!"

He quickly hurried off and tried to shoo the old woman away, only to receive a smack to the head. I smirked and Celebi held my hand tighter. "Look!" We looked and our jaws dropped in awe at the ginormous rocket in front of us. "Woah...is that what we're going to drive?" Giratina whispered.

"What gave you that stupid idea?" our tour guide (or shall we call him some "Guv'ment" official?) grunted as he walked up to us. "That's for the Apollo Mission 8467."

"Wasn't there only 13 missions?" Dialga questioned. He shrugged. "How should we know. We're not NASA." He then pointed to a...very small looking vehicle with a drill in the front of it. "THAT'S what you're driving."

All of our jaws dropped when we saw it. "THAT THING?!" Giratina boomed. "That doesn't even seem big enough to fit a box full of puppies in it!"

"Puppies?" Arceus questioned, giving him an odd glance.

"What? That was the first thing that came to my mind."

He looked away and he led us up to it.

**A few minutes later...full of awkward...**

"Roger roger radar is ready to go. Still have not seen the Subway guy but who cares. This thing will implode if it goes out of the atmosphere sir. Roger that." I murmured into the little walkie-talkie they gave me. Arceus slowly looked at me. "Who're you talking to? We're not even TWO minutes in and you're acting strange."

"And why does she get to drive?!" Palkia whined. "I wanted to drive!"

"Hey! I'm the human here!" I retorted.

"My seat belt is itchy!" Celebi complained.

I don't think any of us were paying attention. The top closed up, making the space even more cramped. And the giant icebox in front of them in the back didn't help any. I sat in the driving seat, Arceus in the passenger seat next to me, Dialga, Palkia, Celebi, and Giratina in the backseats.

And poor little Celebi was in the middle. "Are you six ready?" a voice asked over the intercom. "Holy cow! Where'd that come from?!" Giratina flipped out, making them jump.

"I'm your consciousness." it said awkwardly. "Anyway...are you all set?" I looked at them, making sure if they were, and nodded. "Yes, it appears so." It was silent until it spoke up. "Alright. We will take you all the way down to the lithosphere but from then on, it's up to you. Please refrain from sticking your arms out the windows."

"Sure. Unless we wanted to burn our arms off." Giratina remarked sarcastically.

"Or burn everyone else." Dialga coughed, making Palkia snicker. Arceus reached back without looking and smacked him upside the head. "Let's get going already! I'm already bored!" the Renegade Pokémon groaned.

We jumped when it started up and Celebi yelped when it began to drive itself forward. "Okay I take it back! I want to go home!"

"Too late. I'm not movin'." he grunted.

She pouted and we flinched when we drove outside. "There's a reason why I stay in the Distortion Realm."

"That and the fact that no one likes you." Dialga chuckled. He shot him a nasty glare and he jumped, pulling his body away as far as he could. Palkia rolled his eyes. "Hey what do you think would happen if I started pressing random buttons?" I asked Arceus. He merely stared ahead. "We would explode."

Celebi squeaked loudly in fright as we started to drill down into the ground. "Ladies and gentlemen, please fasten your seatbelts. We're the government and we don't want to pay for any injuries. Why? Because we're cheap that's why." the same voice instructed.

"We're already buckled in you idiot!" Palkia shouted.

"Right in my ear!" Dialga hissed, glaring at him.

"What if we hit animals?" Celebi questioned. The voice snorted and spoke up. "In the crust? Yeah, you're driver will be extra cautious."

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked innocently.

"He's calling you stupid." Palkia informed.

"What?"

"Yep. He did."

"I am not!"

"Why don't we have a little test." I smiled and looked at them. "Since I'm not driving yet, let's see what you know about the Earth." They all stared at me and Arceus huffed. "I created your world. I know everything there is to know."

"Sure Arceus. Sure." I grinned and crossed my arms over my chest. "1st question. What's the composition of the crust? Its thickness? And its average temperature?"

"Easy."

He was about to answer until Giratina spoke up. "Simple. It's composed of dirt and rocks."

"No it's not you moron!" Palkia objected and looked at me. "It's made of some material we don't know of yet!"

"You both are wrong!" Dialga chimed in and smirked. "It's made entirely out of granite."

"And?" I asked, smirking. His smirk disappeared and he frowned. "Uh...some other rock?" Arceus grunted in amusement and closed his eyes. "You're all wrong. The Earth's crust is made of both granite and basalt. Its thickness is 5-100 km and its average temperature is 392-752 degrees."

They shot him a glare. "Show off." they muttered. I smiled and nodded. "Correct. Now what about the oceanic crust?"

"Of course. The composition of the oceanic crust is basalt. Its thickness is 5-8 km and its average temperature is 990 degrees." The others seemed to get even more annoyed by his cocky attitude.

"And the continental crust?"

"Composed of granite; its thickness is 30 km and temperatures range around 200-400 degrees."

"Okay we get it!" Giratina spat. "Arceus knows things we don't! Just shut up already!"

"You know what'd be funny?" Celebi asked after a few seconds. "What if we finished this mission today?"

**Ten minutes later...**

"Alright people. We have reached the lithosphere. Your driver will take over from now on. Again, please refrain from sticking your arms out the windows." the voice informed. Palkia smirked. "What about my foot? Does that count?"

"Feet too."

"My head?"

"Yes...?"

"What about my brother's head?"

"Hey!" Dialga shouted.

"Also we're cutting off transmission to the outside world." it added.

"WAIT WHAT?!" we all shouted before the transmission ended. It was rather silent until I spoke up. "Let's get a move on shall we?" They stayed silent as I drove on. For some reason, I didn't have a driving license yet I was BOSS at driving a drill craft.

"Another question. What about the lithosphere?"

"Basalt." Arceus answered.

"Toothpaste." Giratina grumbled.

"More rocks." Palkia and Dialga answered at the same time.

"Arceus gets the point!" I smiled and looked at him, expecting him to go on.

"It's 15-300 km thick and is 1300 degrees."

"Wanna know what'd be funny?" the Temporal Pokémon asked. We gave off a 'hm' and he went on. "What if the air conditioning fails on us?"

"Shut up Dialga. You have a bad habit of bringing Karma with you. And jinxing us when we least expect it." Giratina growled.

**A half an hour later...**

"Man I really want to touch that ketchup looking stuff." Palkia grunted and pouted. Celebi just glanced up at him. "That's not ketchup, it's the mantle. And it'll kill you if you touch it." Arceus informed and they groaned. "And I might as well tell you about it."

"Please don't."

"The mantle is made of olivine and other things and is 2,900 km thick. It's about 932-1,652 degrees down here."

Giratina rolled his eyes and glared at him. "Anything else?" he asked through gritted teeth.

"Ah yes! The asthenosphere and the mesosphere! The asthenosphere is made up of tar and-"

"Woah woah woah!" Dialga butt in. "How is it made out of tar!? Wouldn't it be made of the same stupid thing the mantle's made of?!"

"Nope. It's tar."

"No it's not!"

They just stared at each other. He huffed and sat back, crossing his arms. "I know I never went to school but I KNOW the astheno-dowhatsitsomething is made out of something else." Arceus rolled his eyes and went on. "It has a thickness of 250 km and a temperature of 1,600 degrees."

"What about the mesosphere?" Palkia asked in a baby tone. He huffed and turned away. "The mesosphere is composed of nitrogen and is 2,550 km thick. It has a temperature of -130 degrees."

"Why's it in the negatives?" Celebi asked curiously.

"I don't know. I think I wasn't paying attention when I was creating things." he replied, brushing his hair out of his eyes.

"And that was how Giratina was born." Dialga said quickly through coughs.

"WHAT?!" Giratina shouted.

**A few minutes later...**

"Stop touching me." Dialga growled, elbowing Palkia harshly in the arm. He flinched and glared at him. "I'm doing nothing!" Celebi slowly inched closer to Giratina as they started yelling at each other for absolutely no reason. I grew more annoyed by the second and slammed my fist down onto the steering wheel, making them stop. "DON'T MAKE ME TURN THIS DRILL CRAFT AROUND AND COME BACK THERE! I'M NOT IN THE MOOD FOR THIS!"

I aggressively pushed a button and the radio came on. "Now we're going to listen to the radio! Any objections and we'll stop right here!"

* * *

After 20 minutes with the radio, I had literally broken it by smashing my foot against it repeatedly after listening to Barbie Girl for the millionth time, requested by Dialga strangely.

And Arceus was now wondering why he wanted to sit in the front.

"I have to go to the bathroom!" Celebi squeaked out, crossing her legs.

"Seriously?! I told everyone to go before we left!" I groaned.

**...**

"Now that we've finally reached the core, why don't you tell us the rest." I grumbled, my voice hoarse from yelling too much. Arceus cleared his throat awkwardly and looked out the window. "Um...the core is made of iron and is 6, 856 km thick and has a temperature of 10,800 degrees."

"The air conditioning isn't helping now!" Palkia groaned, fanning himself.

"What'd I say Dialga!? You just HAD to jinx us!" Giratina spat, glaring at him.

"The outer core is composed of iron and is 2,200 km thick. The temperature gets to 11,000 degrees. And finally the inner core. It's made of iron and nickel and is 1,228 km thick and gets up to 9,000-13,000 degrees."

"I hate you Arceus. I really do." Giratina groaned.

'Once we reach the inner core, I'm driving straight back.' I thought and adjusted the special sunglasses they gave us. It helped to protect our eyes against the light of the core.

"It's worse in here again now that Palkia's touching me." Dialga groaned.

"THAT'S IT!" I shrieked and quickly unbuckled myself and flung myself in the backseat at them, making them scream in horror. Arceus yelped and quickly lurched forward, taking the steering wheel so that we didn't crash. I don't know how that's possible though.

**After we reached the inner core, we headed back for land...which was an excruciatingly long time...**

I groaned as I stepped out of the drill craft and stretched my arms and legs. "Remind me to never call you guys again." Arceus helped Celebi out and let her go. "Okay, let's get you to a bathroom."

"Oh I don't have to go anymore." she smiled.

We all froze and slowly looked at her until Dialga said what we were all thinking. "Ew."


End file.
